Planning ahead to find the right level of care could be one of the most important decisions you make.

Caring for an elderly loved one can be challenging. You or your loved one may feel guilty that you’re not doing enough; while the person being cared for may worry they’re a burden. 

With women usually taking the lead in caring for older relatives, Bupa research has revealed many are pushing themselves to breaking point. Almost two-thirds of women admit to putting off thinking about a care home as they feel it is ‘their duty’ to look after their family, yet one-in-three say that caring for a loved one has put their relationship with the relative under strain and more than a third say it has affected their health.

We all hope our loved ones can live independently and enjoy retirement. But what happens when the health problems of old age affect their – and our own – quality of life? 

We may not like to think about it, but as they get older many people are likely to need care at some point. Care doesn’t have to start with a care home. There are different types of help: from having a care worker visiting for as little as an hour every day, to short stays in care homes to help your relative rest, or recover following an operation as well as permanent residence. 

Planning for a relative’s later life can be complex and emotional. It is difficult to work out what kind of assistance they need and even harder to decide they can no longer live alone.

Start by seeking guidance from your relative’s GP. Then ask your local authority for a care needs assessment to clarify what help is needed and provide an idea of the financial assistance they are entitled to.

If it is clear a care home is the best option, the next step is finding the right one. Moving to a home may seem like a big step, but as well as providing a safe, comfortable place to live.

Modern care homes aim to help people enjoy more independent and fulfilling lives, creating a welcoming atmosphere in which residents enjoy activities, go on outings and make friends with other residents. They also recognise that residents have individual requirements and provide a range of services to meet these needs.

To start with, check if the home offers the kind of care that your family needs. Then consider the home’s location and what it’s like to live there. How will your relative be looked after and how much will it cost? As you look around the home, how does the staff interact with the residents?  

Bupa runs an Elderly Care Support Line for people trying to find their way through the care system. It offers free advice seven days a week on the complex issue of elderly care – from understanding your finance options through to help with choosing the type of care that’s right for you and your family. 

You do not need to be a Bupa customer to access the support line, which can be reached on 0330 134 6642. Bupa also offers a range of guides on elderly care topics, click here to find out more.

Inside View

Elderslie Care Home

Elderslie Care Home (pictured above), in Fulbar Road, Paisley, PA2 9AP, specialises in numerous types of care, with a team skilled in nursing, palliative, convalescence, respite and dementia care. There is also support for adults with Parkinson’s. Manager Lyn McConville says that she is proud of the home’s welcoming atmosphere. Residents have a choice of comfortable lounges and dining areas, while the gardens have seating areas and a gazebo. There is also a cinema room and regular events and outings to enjoy.

What relatives say:

‘The care is outstanding; all the staff go out of their way to ensure the residents are treated with dignity, and their personal hygiene is very well-taken care of. The care that the residents receive is above and beyond what anyone can expect – I would happily book myself in. A comforting experience at a difficult time.’

Quotes based on real testimonials retrieved from carehome.co.uk, accessed December 2014.

For more information about Bupa Care Homes click here.

Quayside Care Home

Quayside Care Home in Halley Street, Glasgow, G13 4DT, is a purpose-built facility offering quality dementia care as well as nursing and palliative care and short stays. Manager Stewart Kyle says: ‘Most rooms have views over the large, landscaped grounds and residents enjoy the sensory garden in the summer.’ A mobile library and entertainers regularly visit; while other activities include cinema evenings, exercise to music, and bingo.

What relatives say:

‘The care my mum gets means I can have peace of mind when I go to sleep at night, and I don't have to worry about her being on her own.’

‘I worried about how my mother would be in a nursing home, but my fears have certainly been laid to rest. My mother is well cared for, and the staff are friendly, helpful and caring.’ 

Quotes based on real testimonials retrieved from carehome.co.uk, accessed December 2014.

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