LAST night at 8.57pm I was sitting in front of my telly counting down the seconds until the mother of all TV shows made its return to the small screen after a 20-year absence.
Yes people, I'm talking about the most functional dysfunctional family in all of Texas,. They're back with a bang and up to their dirty tricks again. Yes, it's Dallas.
Rumours of this revival have been rife for years, and some feared that it would never actually happen, but thanks to fantastic ratings in America – where the series was shown earlier this year – the all new Dallas has been given a second season confirming that we, UK fans, are in for a real treat over the next few weeks.
Back in its heyday Dallas was the undisputed champion of TV shows with its scandalous storylines, nail-biting cliffhangers, gorgeous men and women and possibly the best and most ludicrous twist ever – with Bobby Ewing declared dead but then popping up in the shower for a cheesy it-was-all-a-dream turnaround.
Let's also not forget the 'Who shot JR?' storyline, which triggered major merchandising including the infamous "I shot JR" T-shirt – which even popped up in an episode of Father Ted – and some superb one liners from the man himself to his poor long-suffering wife: "Sue Ellen, you're a drunk, a tramp and an unfit mother."
I remember being a little girl and begging my parents to let me and my sister Lynsey stay up and watch it with them and my father reluctantly agreeing, although we still laugh to this day at my dad's way of dealing with a 'bad bit' that might pop up from time to time.
Any time one of these steamy scenes came on my dad would pretend to have sat on the remote control, accidentally on purpose changing the channels and when he tried to change it back he'd claim that the batteries had gone in the remote and it would be a few minutes before it would work again.
We would talk about Dallas in school and I remember dreaming that one day I would live on a ranch with lots of money, sipping cocktails by the pool with someone as handsome as Bobby Ewing.
The reality is that I live in a tenement flat in Shawlands minus the pool and, instead of a handsome man, I am single and last got chatted up in the Shed by a man wearing white socks with black shoes and who had what I think was broccoli in his teeth.
Let's be honest, though, who needs that dream anyway now that Dallas is back on our screens, and with gorgeous boys like Jesse Metcalfe and Josh Henderson joining the cast, there's never been a better reason to stay snuggled up on your sofa on a Wednesday night, unless that guy with the contents of a vegetable stir fry in his teeth decides to get in touch.
l Don't forget to tune in to STV from 7.30pm tomorrow night for the live STV Appeal 2012 show hosted by the fabulous Lorraine Kelly with me, Manran, Amy MacDonald, left, Fred MacAulay and loads more.
We'll be raising as much money as we can for the one-in-five children living in poverty in Scotland.
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