People are stealing sneakers. It's awful. Boxes of running shoes are piled high and people are lifting them with no sense of shame whatsoever.

I want to alert the appropriate authorities but I can't work out who that would be.

Oh, but wait. This isn't theft, this is swag. These trainers - Asics, £90 - are free.

You can wander up, ask for your size and wander off. As an education reporter this is all well beyond my ken.

"Quick," says the PR executive, "They're giving out jewellery over here and I don't want you to miss out." They're giving out jewellery, Fake Bake products, Patron Silver tequila (£45), Organic Pharmacy facials, massages and Essence cosmetics.

No one mentions the curriculum for excellence. Welcome to the world of celebrity.

Backstage at the MTV EMAs, to be held on Sunday night in Glasgow's The Hydro, and the stars are in for some treats.

Host Nicki Minaj, when she takes up residence in her dressing room, will find tables piled high with stuff.

There's a food table (limited edition whisky, Champagne, "bounce balls" and some Ryvita thins. Oh, and Kettle Chips), her dressing table (diamonte skull) and her MTV EMA Artist Case table.

The case in question is a Samsonite and inside is a cornucopia of crazy luxury: numerous clothes, shoes and beauty products; a two-night stay in a luxury suite from a selection of the world's best five star hotels; a Trespass Performance Down Jacket; membership of "Le Peep Boutique" Private Members' Club in Park Lane, presented in a leather card holder from Aspinal of London; a diamond watch from Trésor Paris; a Lokai bracelet infused with elements sourced from the highest and lowest points on Earth; a pair of SpongeBob SquarePants socks. (She'll also discover some real feel condoms and pleasure gels, but I feel I should allow the lady to find this out for herself).

With roughly 36 hours to go, both the Hydro and its neighbour, the SECC, are buzzing with activity. For the 20th anniversary of the awards show the set is going to be the biggest in MTV EMA history with a time travel theme powered by 10,000 kilometres of cable.

Even unlit it looks pretty stunning and the group of international reporters - who are all far more worldy than myself - seem impressed.

We're forbidden from taking photographs, which is a shame as the before and after pictures would be something else.

At the moment there are roadies, cables and cases absolutely everywhere, each with teasing little snippets written on the front.

One case of four drawers has Plans In Here, PVC, Lamps and Tape written on the fronts and I'd love to peek inside to see which artist the plans belong to.

The red carpet is in the process of being installed. It's an indoor affair and will accommodate 700 fans as well as press (there are around 200 international journalists in Glasgow for the gig).

While the stage is interesting, behind it is what we really want to see. The artists will be set up in dressing rooms in the SECC.

The area has been laid out like a village centre with Glasgow place names - Ashton Lane, Buchanan Street - distinguishing one temporary walled corridor from another. It's large enough that a woman shoots past on a scooter, sailing from dressing room to office.

We're allowed a tour of the artist's dining area, decorated in black and gold with fresh flowers, leather couches and side tables resting on the shoulders of enormous plastic pigs. There's a life-size horse lamp and an armchair like a Faberge egg. What must it be like to have people hire stylists to design a room a room just so you can sit and eat one meal? Between the restaurant and the dressing rooms is the treatment area.

The Organic Pharmacy, a skin care and cosmetics brand, has set up temporary shop to give the jetlagged artists treatments and health advice. An expert is on hand to give the stars advice about homeopathic remedies - from restorative to calming drops.

Fake Bake is offering full body spray tans behind what looks to me like a precariously flimsy curtain. Post show massages are on offer. Essence, a brand with a stall that looks like a sweetie shop, is offering manicures. Everyone is extremely polite, knowledgeable and deferential. No wonder you rarely see celebrities on the bus - this level of interest and service must become very easy to be accustomed to.

Personally, I am far more goody-two-shoes than take-these-free-shoes. It's exciting to be offered a free pair of sneakers or a gold and diamante encrusted cuff because I'm thrifty. But I wonder how much joy comes from so much glitzy gifting when you have the pay packet to go out and buy any of these items on a whim.

I'm sure, however, none such thoughts will cross the mind of any of the artists on Sunday night. Just the music and the adoration.