Brian Beacom

GANGSTERS, stabbings in doctors’ surgeries, cover-ups, and chaos . . .

Yes, River City’s scriptwriters continue to reach into the sewers of the human condition to come up with ratings grabbers.

But that’s not to say they’re not prepared to utilise emotional conflict where possible.

This week the Shieldinch focus is on car mechanic Bob. And it seems the wheels are coming off his personal life.

Bob, as we’ve learned in recent episodes is daft to the point of despair over new girl Kim, the woman who has escaped to from the clutches of marital cruelty.

However, Kim and Bob want to seal their love - even though they’ve known each other less time than it takes to walk into Mothercare - with a baby.

“They want to have a baby but they can’t have children the natural way,” says actress Frances Thorburn, who plays Kim.

“So they agreed that Bob’s friend Angus would be a sperm donor.”

Yet, the basting process didn’t work. And to complicate matters, Angus, having been facing a life or death operation to remove a brain tumour, felt the pressure to help his friend.

“Kim and Angus made a last minute decision to try and have a baby the natural way,” says Frances.

And that will mean not only the wheels coming off Bob’s car, but the engine is set to blow up.

Angus’s girlfriend Cassie has already found out the truth about the one night stand but kept quiet until Angus got the all clear following an op to remove his tumour.

Now he’s on the mend, the secret’s not about to stay hidden for long. and it’s only a matter of time before Bob discovers the reality.

Because as we know the first rule of soap opera is that no secret is every kept. And the second rule is no good deed, however bonkers, goes unpunished.

“Now that she’s pregnant, Kim wants to tell Bob, but Angus wants to hold off.

“Everybody, it seems knows except Bob.”

Can Angus convince Bob that his idea of having sex with his girlfriend was coming from a good place?

Here’s another question the viewers will be wondering; why didn’t Angus simply got a sperm bank and have his sperm frozen, and perhaps Kim could go for IVF at a later date?

“Well . . . . I don’t know,” says Frances, smiling. “It was a panic decision that saw them have sex.”

Mmm, it’s unusual, you suggest. Couples sometimes have drunken sex, impromptu sex, and often regretful sex.

But panic sex? That’s irregular.

“I’m not sure. Best you don’t quote me on that.”

Regardless of how improbable the storyline, the result is Kim is with child. Will Bob and Kim survive him knowing?

More importantly, will Bob and Angus survive.

In recent times, the pair have been closer than any two men this side of Brokeback Mountain.

“That’s true. They are on a rocky road. And we will get to see another side of Bob. He’s having to cope with a massive situation.”

Bob, played by Stephen Purdon, is of course a nice guy. Does he turn into Jack Nicholson in The Shining?

“We might see a bit of a change in Bob,” hints Frances, keeping her script cards close to her chest.

Yet, although Bob has been declared infertile and declared incapable of creating new life, this is TV soap.

And that means there’s always a chance a single Shellsuit tadpole could have found it’s way to Kim’s fallopians.

Could we have a Who’s The Daddy storyline develop?

“At the moment, the front runner is Angus,” says Frances, in coy voice.

Ah, but there is another runner?

“Who knows. Maybe that will be looked at later on.”

That will be discovered in the fullness of time. For now, Frances is delighted to be part of River City.

“I had the husband storyline, the man I had to run away from, and then I fell in love very quickly with Bob,” she says, “and I it’s been great because it’s a storyline that does happen in real life.

“And I’m working with a stalwart cast, which has been so good to be a part of.”

The storyline is essentially about the test of true love. How much can couples contend with?

Could Frances cope with such a breach of trust?

“I don’t know if I’d want to talk about that in an interview,” she says.

“I would say I don’t think the situation is ideal - but I wouldn’t want to discuss that on a personal level.”

Let’s move on, then.

Outside of River City and it’s heightened reality, Frances wedding singer.

She is also set to appear in Oran Mor’s summer panto, Punocchio, from Monday.

As the title suggests, it tells the story of the wooden boy with fake news issues, and there will be the usual poltical commentary.

But it will feature an inordinate amount of puns.

“It’s all going well,” says Frances of rehearsals.

“We should be ready for Monday’s opening.”

What’s her motivation for her character? Does she recall telling lots of lies as a young girl growing up in . . . .

“There’s not too character motivation,” she says smiling. “It’s a panto with lots of puns.”

Is she a fan of puns. “Yes, ish. But anyway, we’re not talking about panto, we’re talking about River City.”

We are. Or we were.

“I’m having a great time playing Kim,” she says.

*River City, BBC Scotland, Tuesday at 8pm.