My two children (daughter, 12, and son, 10) are forever fighting.

I work from home - which is hard when I'm forever overseeing another battle. I try to spend as much time with them as possible but it never seems enough.

My daughter is getting worse and worse; she's always been quick-tempered and she's forever picking on her brother. I try to remain fair, but it so difficult and punishments such as loss of pocket money or no TV just don't seem to work.

I have never hit my children, but if I can't sort this out soon I'm worried I may just lose control. NORA

l Most brothers and sisters squabble and fight; it's all part of the process of becoming independent and learning to socialise and live with other people.

Rather than punishments, have you considered rewards? If they can stay quiet and avoid confrontation all morning, you'll take them somewhere they want to go in the afternoon, for example.

Talk to them quietly and separately to find out what it is that really gets them going and see if you can find a way to help them deal with that.

Perhaps your daughter's boredom threshold is lower than your son's? See if you can find out what is angering her and, at the same time explain why you find their bickering so trying.

Look for ways you can get them doing things and mixing with other children - your local sports centre may have activities, for example.

Finally, there is always someone at the end of a phone if you feel that you need to let off steam or just talk - contact Parentline Plus on 0808 800 2222.

I hate how he eats

My husband has just made contact with a cousin he hasn't seen for over 20 years. They discovered they have a lot in common, so now the cousin is spending a lot of time with us. He's a nice enough man and I'm happy for my husband - but I hate the way his cousin eats! He rarely closes his mouth and sprays his food everywhere because he insists on talking while he is eating.

I I find it disgusting and I'm worried the children will pick up his bad habits, but how can I tell him without causing offence? MARGARET

l There's no way to tell someone, tactfully, that you find one of their personal habits disgusting. Either you learn to ignore it, or you have to come right out and ask him to eat more quietly.

I don't know how old your children are, but we managed to "cure" one adult friend by giving our children a hard time at the dinner table! They were thoroughly ticked off for talking with their mouth full, spraying their food, etc, and the friend either took the hint or learned his lesson - the children, bless 'em, never let on that we'd discussed the tactic with them first!