A TERRIBLE terrible crime was apparently committed on the mean streets of Glasgow this week, a crime so hideous it left all who saw it crying out for the police...
well, the fashion police.
Yes I am of course talking about the grand unveiling of Scotland's Commonwealth Games kit designed by Jilli Blackwood which the athletes will wear at the opening ceremony. It seems the general public were so massively offended by the turquoise, fuchsia and navy tartan get up that it went on to dominate most of our newspapers and TV reports this week.
It's a strange old combo of colours and patterns, I'll give you that, but honestly I can't see what all the fuss is about as I can safely say I'm firmly in the "They'll be wearing it for all of about 30 seconds in the opening ceremony, so let's all take a nice big deep breath" kinda camp.
I've been way more offended with the reaction the kit has caused rather than the kit itself and as for poor Jilli the designer goodness knows how she must be feeling right now.
I'm hoping she's used a portion of her paycheque to get on the next flight out to somewhere extremely hot and exotic where she'll be greeted by a hunky big man in a grass skirt holding a tray of piña coladas just to get away from it all.
I know only too well what it feels like to be publicly humiliated over a choice of clothing. After all you're talking to the woman who was told by Simon Cowell on live TV in front of an estimated audience of 12 million people to "burn the monstrosity" I was wearing in the Pop Idol final.
I just find it slightly amusing that we've all got our tartan undergarments in a twist over this.
Social media sites nearly went into meltdown with negative comments such as disgusting, vile and my personal favourite 'Made in Scotland, by curtains' and even radio and news programmes have dedicated debates on the matter.
At the end of the day this is a hugely positive time for Glasgow and Scotland as a country with some of the world's greatest athletes coming to town bringing with them the world's media.
So I say let's just accept that the uniforms aren't exactly everyone's cup of Irn Bru and get on with supporting our Scottish competitors during the upcoming two weeks spectacular. It's going to be a fantastic time with lots of amazing events happening throughout the city including The Glasgow Green Live Zone which will see the park transformed into a 'home' hosting a free house party with events, performances and live coverage of the sporting action on the main stage in the 'Living Room'.
Some of Scotland's leading food producers will showcase the best Scottish Ingredients in the giant food village in 'The Kitchen' with come and try sports sessions being held in the 'Back Garden'.
I am delighted to have been asked to host the main stage at one of these events in the Green, but there is lots more happening around the city too, with daily performances in the Merchant City - which is also home to the new Festival 2014 Club in the evening at the Old Fruit Market and at the new refurbished Kelvingrove Bandstand hosting family friendly performances, comedy, music and film including screenings of classic films by Bill Forsyth.
BBC at the Quay completes the line-up of festival venues, with live broadcasts of TV and radio programmes.
As long as we win lots of medals they can wear tartan tutus with matching tartan wings with sparkles on them for all I care, although after that little fashion brainwave it's a wonder I wasn't offered the designing gig because that actually would have been a look worth talking about.
I'D LIKE to say a huge thanks to Vicki at Athena Design & Print for my beautiful Edinburgh Festival artwork.
Michelle McManus' Reality: The Musical is looking five stars in print and hopefully I can do the same onstage.
Thanks to Athena, Scotland can look forward to thousands of pink and blue leaflets with my wee coupon on them coming their way.