The other night whilst travelling home on the train from work, I couldn’t help but overhear two heavily laden women yakking on about their latest purchases.

“I’m glad we went for a wee drink or two Sheila.”

“Me too,” her pal agreed as she added.

“After all, those earlier trains would have been crammed with commuters and we would never have managed on with all of these bags.”

And I had a feeling that the pair would have conjured up any old excuse to go for a few drinks as Sheila added.

“Now we’ve bought all this shopping Betty …..” the pair looked at the array of carrier bags at their feet.

“How the heck do we sneak them in to the house?”

I could almost hear the cunning cogs in their heads working overtime, when finally Sheila had a brainwave.

“I’ll drop my bags off at our Anns’ house on the way home and collected them when Willie’s at work.”

“Brilliant idea.” Her pal sounded as though she had just discovered the eighth Wonder of the World.

“I’ll phone and make sure my sister is in too.”

I regaled their chit chat to my pals when we caught up for our weekly get-together, and was surprisingly enlightened as to the lengths some women will go to hide their purchases.

Apparently a very experienced salesman had gotten the better of Fiona when she called in to a sports warehouse to look at a pair of walking boots.

“I only went in for a nosey,” she explained.

“And walking out of the store half an hour later I realised I had bought walking boots, thermal underwear, a waterproof jacket with matching trousers, gloves, socks……. and even a blinkin flask.”

We wondered how on earth Fiona had managed to explain her multiple purchases when she got home.

“I started with the walking boot, and every few weeks I introduced another item to my outfit so that it wasn’t obvious I had spent so much money.”

I thought that was quite a clever idea when Shona added.

“I gave billy an earful when he asked if I’d bought yet another new dress.”

“Billy, I said, no wonder I feel neglected.”

“I’ve had this dress on umpteen times and you’ve never noticed.”

I thought poor bloke, how cunning was it of my friend to use reverse psychology on her unwitting husband.

“But what if he checks the bank account?” One bright spark asked.

“Best thing to do is lift out small amounts of cash from the bank account every now and then, and that way when you want to buy something you will have the money.”

Pleased with herself she added.

“Just make sure you hide the receipts, and…….. Your purchases won’t show up on your bank statement!”

The girls all seemed eager to spill the beans on their guileful ideas.

“I sometimes put my shopping in the wheelie bin until the coast is clear,” confessed another pal.

“So long as it’s not bin collection day obviously.”

“I ordered some outfits for my holidays and when a huge box arrived my husband went ballistic,” explained another of the girls.

“I lied and said I had signed for the package for a neighbour, but from then on I made sure all of my packages were sent to my work address.”

And I wondered if that might be the reason why so many people get packages sent to my workplace.

Foolishly I thought it was because there was always someone to sign for deliveries, and I’m sure that’s the case on most occasions, but now I reckon there are probably at lot of sneaky packages delivery here too.

“Another top tip is to always take shoes and boots out of their boxes before taking them home.”

Susan offered yet another female piece of intelligence.

“I once managed to sneak in three pairs of boots at one time because I took them out of the boxes, rolled them up and stuffed them into a carrier bag.”

We all laughed at the very idea, however, I could see the girls were soaking up these tips like a sponge.

“Sometimes if John is home before I am,” confessed Yvonne.

“I throw the carrier bag over the hedge and wait till he in the shower before I nip out and sneak it into the house.”

Finally I drew the conversation to a conclusion.

“Girls, looking to the future I might just have the answer.”

I now had the full attention of my pals.

“Drones.”

“Eh?.....”

“A retailer is starting to test flying drones that can deliver parcels to your door, and when it reaches your address it comes down vertically and drops your shopping on to a special mat which you could hide up the back of yours or a neighbours garden and he need never know!”

Clever or what?