Don't forget your frying pan if you're camping at festival

WITH the month of July now firmly under way, the festival season in Scotland has fired up its proverbial campervan engines and set off at top speed.

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This summer will see the likes of T in the Park, Wicker Man and Rewind Festivals all taking place.

Last weekend saw mega star Dolly Parton take to the stage at Glastonbury, wearing a stunning Swarovski detailed waistcoat - designed and made right here in Glasgow by the hugely talented costumier Iona Barker - as she wowed the 200,000 strong crowd, although reports suggested she may have been miming on the day.

I didn't see the performance as I was on stage at the exact same time performing a country set with Honest Sam and The Dealers at the stunning Kelvingrove Bandstand to close this year's West End Festival, but I managed to catch it online the next day and I genuinely don't think she was miming.

It looks like there was a slight delay in the broadcast and let's face it, it just makes no sense that a performer of Dolly's calibre would ever even consider it?

She gave a great response when questioned by the press about it afterwards saying: "My boobs are fake, my hair's fake but what is real is my voice and my heart."

Festivals, however much fun they seem though, are certainly not for the faint-hearted as I sadly discovered a few years ago when I attempted to camp for a weekend.

I was living in London at the time and had been offered some free tickets for V Festival, in Chelmsford, at the last minute. So myself and two girlfriends decided to go along for the weekend.

None of us had ever camped before, so we bought a cheap throw-away pop-up tent (a mistake of epic proportions) and packed ­­plenty of liquids, mainly alcohol, some food and off we went.

It wasn't until we arrived that we realised how poorly equipped we were for the weekend.

There were tents the size of small apartments pitched right up beside us with conservatory styled eating areas complete with deck chairs and ice buckets full of booze not to mention the smell of sizzling bacon in tiny travel frying pans driving us daft as we tried to fit three women into our two- man pop up shoe box that had been sold to us the day before by some 18-year-old shop assistant clearly having a laugh.

There wasn't much we could do though as we were there for three days and just had to get on with it.

By the last night, however, we were broken beyond belief and dreaming of hot baths and our own beds the next day. It was about 3am in the morning and I was curled up against the back wall of the tent when I felt a real warmth on my face followed by some pretty gross noises and smells. But because I was in such a deep sleep it took me a few seconds to realise what had happened and when the penny finally dropped I jumped up, screaming my head off, waking up the entire campsite up.

Turned out one of the festival-goers had decided to drink the remainder of his group's alcohol as it was the last night, which resulted in him vomiting all down our tent at the exact spot where I was sleeping.

My friends and I jumped out of the tent to get a looked at the Duke of Puke, but it was too late as our Geordie neighbour next door whose beautiful conservatory styled eating area had obviously suffered a similar fate to our wee polly bag of a tent was chasing the Vomit Comet down the campsite with that tiny frying pan of bacon loveliness.

That was the final straw for us ladies, and we packed up shop there and then and spent the remainder of the night in the car.

So if you are camping at one of the many festivals up and down the country this summer, you most certainly need to be made of stronger stuff and be extremely prepared for all eventualities, but above all you must never ever forget your trusty tiny frying pan.

I'm delighted to be hosting and performing tomorrow evening at the Sean's Trust Charity Dinner Dance, in the Fullerton Suites, in Glasgow.

Sean's Trust was launched by the late Councillor George Ryan and his wife Linda after their own baby boy was sadly stillborn in 2000. The charity aims to offer support and respite to other families who have unfortunately had to suffer a loss of this kind, and we are looking to raise as much money as possible to help those who find themselves in these devastating circumstances.

For more information about the trust, visit their Facebook page at

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