"AH the power that gift would give us, to see ourselves as others see us ..." is a famous quote from Rabbie Burns.

 

"But how do we see ourselves?" I found myself wondering.

And the reason I was asking myself was my recognition that people seem to see themselves somewhat different to what they really are.

Many years ago, before internet dating began, the Evening Times introduced a section in the paper called, 'Find a Friend.'

The idea was that if you were looking for a companion, friend or future husband or wife, then you could reply to an ad in the paper via a PO Box number.

However, even in those days, it wasn't as simple as it first appeared.

One day an elderly man came in to the Evening Times' reception desk clutching an envelope which contained his advert for Find a Friend.

Thanking him, I began reading his description of himself, which was short and straight to the point.

"Middle aged gentleman, of smart appearance. Has his own boat. Would like to hear from women of any age ..." And then he had the cheek to add: "Preferably a home owner."

I didn't know which was funnier, his description of himself or his cheek at requesting a home owner.

His description was certainly far removed from the man who stood in front of me.

This old chancer looked to be in his late seventies, with long straggly, unkempt hair and his rag and bone clothes had definitely seen better days.

I remember thinking "The poor woman who answers this ad is in for a bit of a shock."

However, over the years, despite technology revolutionising dating options, some things don't seem to have changed that much at all.

People apparently still lie the majority of the time when describing themselves.

Men it seems, tend to say they have a better job or have a more senior role than they actually do.

And, if their profession sounds a bit boring, they exaggerate it to make it sound more glamorous.

Apparently, some even say they work in the film industry or they know a celebrity.

As if that's not enough, some paint a picture of a taller, slimmer guy with an athletic build when the reality is they have a pot belly with not a muscle in sight.

Women on the other hand tend to lie about similar issues as men do.

However, they also tend to lie about their age, their height, and even their bust size.

I've often wondered why people go to such lengths to distort the truth about themselves.

Because, if you claim, for instance, to be a 40-year-old female who is 5ft 8", of slim build with a 36" bust, surely when your date first claps eyes on you it must be obvious, (if he recognises you), that you really are 50, 5ft2" with a bit of a belly and a bust that's flat as a pancake.

Last weekhaving a catch-up with a group of my friends, the chat turned to the endless list of dating disasters they've endured or heard about.

We laughed at some of the many disillusioned internet daters when Shona told us how she was stopped in her tracks when she first met her would-be beau.

"Janice, without exaggeration, his internet picture must have been taken at least 10 years ago," Shona still appeared to be fuming.

"He was bald, heavy and barely recognisable.

"And," she continued, "when I pointed out that he looked nothing like his photograph, do you know what he replied?"

We listened intently.

"Ah, well hen, I'm like a good wine ... I improve with age," and then he laughed.

Obviously his vintage didn't meet Shona's expectations, if her face was anything to go by.

Sitting quietly, Dianne finally piped up: "I think I can top that one."

All eyes and ears switched to Dianne. None of us thought her date could have been more of a revelation than Shona's.

"The description of Bill on the internet made me think he was right up my street," Dianne said.

"He ticked all the boxes and sounded like my perfect partner."

"So what went wrong?" Shona asked.

"Well, as I walked towards him my face lit up because his description of himself seemed to be pretty accurate."

"And?" we collectively gasped.

"Well, the minute he stood up to greet me it became apparent that Bill was deaf and dumb."

None of us knew how to respond to that one.

"Which would have been perfectly fine," admitted Dianne, "had I known what to expect."

"And when he saw the startled look on my face he wrote down on a piece of paper 'Sorry Dianne, but you look surprised'."

"When I asked him why he hadn't mentioned he was deaf and dumb he just got really angry and left."

Apparently, one in five marriages across the world starts online, so obviously not everyone tells lies.

Some just conveniently omit to tell the whole truth.