Was it Darth Vader ... or Johann Who?

THE MSPs have all gone home for Christmas and are eagerly waiting to find out if Santa decided they have been good boys and girls this year.

Loading Comments
Share
Print

Holyrood Week decided to find out from Father Christmas and the top politicians what was on their Christmas list and what they would be doing over the holidays.

They all answered 'world peace' and 'working in the constituency', but we appealed to the Information Commissioner to get the real answers.

The First Minister has invited everyone round to Bute House for a giant game of 'Salmond Says'.

He will stand at the fireplace and conduct "Salmond Says put your hand on your heart … and repeat 'the best people to make decisions about Scotland are the people who live and work here'."

Then he has got the Chancellor and EU leaders coming round. "Salmond Says let Scotland in the EU." "Salmond says let Scotland use the pound after independence".

The game's full title is 'Just Do As Salmond Says'.

Scottish Labour leader Johann Lamont has asked Santa for a part as Darth Vader in the next Star Wars movie. Following the poll that showed 41% of people did not know who she was, she wants to know someone feels her presence.

Instead, we hear Santa is delivering to her a script for a new time travelling franchise north of the Border. It's called Johann Who?

This is just in case it does come to pass that we won't actually be able to watch Doctor Who should Scotland become independent.

Scottish Secretary Alistair Carmichael has written to Lapland and says he has been a good boy, which is why Premier David Cameron and Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg promoted him.

However, he added a PS to Santa saying he didn't think Deputy First Minister Nicola Sturgeon should get any presents, because she pulled his pigtails on the telly and wouldn't stop, even though he was pleading.

Ms Sturgeon will again spend the holidays at home with a box set of Danish political drama Borgen on telly on repeat.

It's not the show, featuring Birgitte Nyborg, the fictional female PM of a small northern European country, that is on repeat but Ms Sturgeon repeating "that should be me, that should be me".

Talking of Borgen, David Cameron has written to the real Danish PM, Helle Thorning-Schmidt, asking for a copy of the 'selfie' she took with him and Barack Obama at Nelson Mandela's memorial service in Johannesburg.

She wrote back saying, sorry, she cut him out of it. Which is exactly what Michelle Obama did to her in the copy delivered to the White House.

Our MSPs now have two weeks to recharge their batteries before the all-out referendum warfare that is 2014 beckons.

To all mentioned in this column (because I know Barack is a reader) and to all our readers: Have a very happy Christmas.

Local government

Commenting & Moderation

We moderate all comments on Evening Times on either a pre-moderated or post-moderated basis. If you're a relatively new user then your comments will be reviewed before publication and if we know you well and trust you then your comments will be subject to moderation only if other users or the moderators believe you've broken the rules

Moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours. Please be patient if your posts are not approved instantly.

146038

Have you got a story?

Contact the news desk on 0141 302 6520 or email news@eveningtimes.co.uk
            Michelle McManus            
                       

Michelle McManus

                       

Sussed in the City

                       

What Robert De Niro and my mum have in common

           
Free swim at a Glasgow Club pool for every reader - Click here

Entertainment

Lifestyle

Wedding
Janice Bell

Janice Bell

You couldn’t make up half the stuff that happens to PA Janice Bell- some of the jams she gets herself into are worth a story or two.

                Games news:                
                               

Putting the world to rights

                               

Gail's Gab

                               

Embrace the sun but be careful

               
Cat’s Eyes on Glasgow

Cat’s Eyes on Glasgow

Cat Cubie’s job is to find and share with you the fabulous things the city has to offer, from gigs to gastro.