I BUMPED into an old school pal the other day who I hadn't seen in years.

 

And, and after the initial "you look great ," ... ' Oh, so do you", polite chit chat, it was obvious by her actions that she was bursting to show me something.

Out of the corner of my eye her shoulder bag appeared to be starting to move.

Then, suddenly out popped a tiny white bundle of fur with a bright pink bow on top.

"This is Peek-a-Boo," she stated, as she introduced me to the smallest dog I have ever seen.

"It's absolutely gorgeous," smiling at the tiny pooch. "What is it?"

"Oh she's a miniature Shih Tzu," she gushed. "Isn't she just adorable?"

"She certainly is," I gushed back, attempting to be polite because I'm allergic to dogs.

"What a lovely wee thing she is."

"She's still a baby," enthused my old friend.

"She is just sooooooo cuddly and keeps me cosy in bed at night."

"Don't tell me you let her sleep in your bed?"

Well, I couldn't help myself.

"Oh yes. Peek-a-Boo doesn't like in her own bed," she said looking at the dog for confirmation.

I held back from pointing out that dogs weren't put on this earth to sleep in your bed ... or to be carried about in a handbag.

No, they should be running around or huddled in a corner somewhere with an old blanket.

And anyway, would we like to go to bed every night with a fur coat on?

Moving quickly on, the proud owner was quick to show me Peek-a-Boo's tiny paw which had perfectly manicured bright pink nails. And one nail even had a small diamante on it.

I was lost for words. However, my long lost pal wasn't.

"She's got five different coats you know."

"Haven't you?" she actually asked the dog. "But the one she's wearing is definitely her favourite."

"She's lost the plot," I mumbled to myself.

"How the heck can a puppy have a favourite coat? (Other than the one it's born with)."

Losing the will to live listening to the never ending list of the many luxury items this small canine treasure trove owned, I finally bade her farewell and shook my head as I wondered at the lengths owners go to for their pets.

Later that evening my son Ross invited me to go with him to visit his friend Steven and his new bride Lesley, who had recently returned from honeymoon.

We were eager to hear about their honeymoon adventures in Australia.

However, Steven only seemed interested in showing us their latest purchase.

Never mind towels, bedding or crockery for newlyweds Steven and Lesley. Oh no, they were thrilled with their new addition which took pride of place in their living room.

"Wait until you see our new aquarium," enthused Steven.

"It's absolutely amazing."

"How amazing can an aquarium be?" I asked myself. "After all, it's just fish in water."

But how wrong was I?

"We've only got one fish at the moment," explained Steven, "but it's just a cheap one."

I was struggling to see the relevance of a 'cheap fish' until Lesley enlightened us.

"You see, the water filter and temperature needs to be perfect and, as some of the tropical fish are really expensive, we thought we would test it out on a cheap one first.

"That way if the fish doesn't make it. We haven't lost so much money."

And this seemed to make perfect sense to the newlyweds.

On closer inspection, we watched as one solitary large fish swam about happily in its new surroundings.

The cheap fish, having literally tested the water, looked as though it wasn't about to pop-it's-clogs anytime soon, which meant that Steve and Lesley were now safe to buy a more exotic and expensive tropical fish.

Now I like a single fish as much as the next person ... but prefer mine with a pickle, so I was struggling to get excited.

And that's when it happened.

Sitting back down with our cup of tea, Ross and I watched as an enthusiastic Steven lifted a remote control and pointed it at the aquarium.

"Now watch this," he said, his eyes lighting up. "Dim the lights Lesley," he commanded as though we were watching a show at the Pavilion.

And then there began a light show - FOR A FISH - the likes of which I have never seen before in my life.

"You can have disco mode," Steven announced.

And sure enough flashing disco lights waved through the water.

"Or the lights can just change colour ..."

Next minute the room went from blue to red to green and then.

"And it can simulate day time," he went on as the lights turned to white.

Ross and I were transfixed with the flashing colours around the room.

"The poor fish must wonder if it's night or day." I whispered.

"And there a sound system too," Lesley added, keen to get in on the act.

"Really? A sound system? For the fish?" I thought to myself. But sure enough I soon was sitting flabbergasted as I tapped my foot to the sound of music. Music for fish!

Driving home I attempted to get things into perspective.

"You know Ross, in my day we had a dog which had a collar, lead, bowl and a blanket ... and a goldfish in a bowl without the water music.